Traveling with Kids

When we tell people that we have been traveling on a boat for the past five years with teenagers they usually shake their heads and say something like, “Man oh man, I can’t believe you guys are still in one piece,” or “how did you get the hormone inhibitors into their OJ?” or “what are you smoking and where can I get some?” Years ago, when we first considered traveling with our teens we thought “What could be better?” There are no: diapers, pacifiers to lose, strollers, or breast milk filled bottles you have to taste at airport security lineups. With this in mind, we began our cruising journey with gusto and discovered that traveling with teens is terrific. They can feed themselves (most of the time), read signs (unless it’s 9am), and help with maps and luggage (but not if there is an arcade within a mile radius). You can take an 11 hour drive through Italy to Venice and a teenager can honestly appreciate a few hours at the Uffizi. Just make sure you carry copious amounts of Red Bull and promise there will be pasta or gelato involved. Although..I promise the same thing to Mike and it works just as well. Come to think of it, I’d do just about anything for pasta or gelato, which makes Italy a fine tourist destination.  Sure there were a few bumps in the road (waves off our bow), but we loved traveling with our teens. At a time when most families seem to lose their kids to the mall and their peers, we relished the chance to forge some lasting memories.

Learning about Ancient History in Memphis

These days, with more people working flexible hours from home, extended travel is becoming a wider reality. People rent out their homes, pack up, and head to warmer climes for a month or longer without giving up a day’s wage. If you can swing it, we highly recommend extended travel with kids, but there are a few things to consider, especially if you are thinking for traveling for a month or longer.

1. As much as possible, plan destinations that capture the imagination of the whole family. The Coin Collecting for the past Ten Thousand Years Museum might be less than intoxicating for kids who are used to Tony Hawke’s Skateboarding Mega-Tron Adventure and the mind blowing Universal Studios. Sure you will have to hit your fair share of museums of natural history and “this important spot where this important guy did this important thing” (and it IS so valuable for them to be exposed to this), but after touring several sights of a similar genre try to include some fun days at an amusement park or simple events like a picnic or hiking to give everyone a break from the museum circuit.
2. Let freedom ring. Allow for personal space as often as you can. Although the square footage of our boat is small, each of our kids has their own bedroom and we encouraged them to decorate it as wildly as they wanted. In fact, we stalled on putting up the wall covering in Lauren’s room for almost two years so she could write on her walls. She had every inch covered in poetry, quotes, thoughts, music lyrics, rants, friend’s signatures and pictures that were scrawled out in various colors of magic marker. It still exists underneath the now green wall covering. Your kids may not have their own room while you travel, so how about letting them decorate a suitcase with travel stickers or patches? Whatever it takes to help them “own” the journey. Also, allow for some personal down time. While in Israel, Stefan had exhausted his brain’s capacity for historical landmarks and the day we were to go to the Wailing Wall he asked to stay home. I debated, but in the end figured if he really felt a lack of it later on in his life, he could make the journey back to Israel on his own. He stayed home, played Nintendo and caught up with a few subjects in school. When we returned, he was his cheerful self again and ready to hit the road the next day.
3. Make sure there is internet. The first books I read about people living aboard took place mainly in the 70’s and 80’s, basically the dark ages, when traveling on a boat meant that there were no cell phones or SAT phones or GPS or internet. We are so fortunate that when our kids said goodbye to friends they were able to keep up with them through the various social links on the web. They posted pictures, shared gossip, and when we returned for a visit, they were able to pick right up where they had left off. The internet was their lifeline.  Most big cities have wifi now, and for the general traveler, this shouldn’t be a problem. For us, it only became difficult when we were docked in smaller port towns where internet was either nonexistent or came with a hefty price tag. We learned to inquire ahead of time to make sure that the marina had internet and if there would be an extra fee. The bytes can add up when there are four of you on facebook discussing such important issues as a hang nail.
4. Allow room for friendship. Before we even moved onto Chrysalis, we instigated a work/savings plan so that our kids could help pay for their friends to come and visit. Several made the trip and we have fond memories of our experiences with landlubbing friends aboard. The reality of extended travel as a family, though, is that you really only have two options: you either become friends with your crewmates or you die. This meant that Mike and I re-learned how to play video games, teepee bedrooms, run around the companionways playing tag, and hide around a corner in order to scare the heck out of someone. And I can tell you from personal experience, this kind of behavior is the best cure for the mid-life crisis ever.  So parents, once in awhile, let go of your perceived need to be a towering role model, and go out and purchase a whoopee cushion for heaven’s sake.
5. Be flexible. A parable: There was a time when we were docked in a very small town that had no coffee shops nearby (I know…a few places like this still exist in the world) and the grocery market was a long walk away, the whole town was kind of dirty, and in my opinion everything was inconvenient and there was zilcho to do. From about day 1 of our arrival, I had my eye on a fabulous, ancient, monastery, only an overnight cruise away, where it was rumored that Saint What’s His Name had turned fish into chocolate and I decided I HAD to get out of this no-namer town and head there right now.  But just down the street from where we were docked, there was a lovely time-share hotel with a revolving door of families with teenagers holidaying over differing Spring Breaks. Our kids were having a blast with all these teenagers hanging around and playing beach volleyball, so we decided to change our whole spring cruising schedule in order to stay an extra month at this zilcho town so the kids could hang with their homies which meant that I had to call and rebook all our marinas, etc. Plus, I never did get a chance to go to that monastery and eat the holy chocolate, a thought that plagues me to this day. Enough said. It’s a parable. You figure it out.

So our advice: brave the intrepid waters of traveling with teens. You’ll come away with some fantastic memories and deepen your relationships.